two-zero and I am no hero

I'm gonna be honest. Turning 20 really did make a big difference. I'm a little excited but also a little afraid of not knowing what is going to happen in these next ten years of life. I mean I'll be waiting on God to lead me to make all the big decisions that will be upcoming like marriage, career, kids, house etc but it's a little crazy that they will probably occur within the next decade of my life.

I feel like an adult sometimes, but I also feel like a dependent. It a weird "caught in the middle" kinda feeling. In some way turning 20 has made my entry into adulthood definite, there is no turning back.

Lately I've been going through a pretty difficult period of discovering (once again) who I am. Who am I as a woman? Who am I as adult? Who am I as a daughter of the king? It's a hard process because the flaws and the part of selfishness inside of me is being revealed, laid on the table to be eliminated. I can't go on trying to pursue the dreams God has given me if I don't even believe in myself.

God I pray that you would show me who I am in your eyes. Give me the wisdom, perseverance and desire to strengthen the areas I am weak. I will place my confidence for the rest of my life in you alone. Amen.