Taking a step UP.

A few months ago God spoke to me deeply about starting up a worship team for the middle school youth group I lead each thursday. It happened the day of the first kick off for the youth group.

He gave me an image of kids jumping and dancing with arms raised praising God, filled with a passion to shout out the name of the One who saved them. Right afterwards I hit my computer and put my vision down in words. I called it (A Vision, A Dream, A Plan of Action)..if you go to my notes on facebook you will find it.

At the time I had just started going to school..I knew nothing about worship leading nor could I play any instruments (unless you count my one chord strumming)! I was reluctant and didnt believe in myself enough to actually take the vision seriously. I had been a part of worship teams but leading one? you got to be kidding me!

I mean I was passionate about the idea but was I dedicated enough to take any ACTION?

A month later the idea was still constantly turning in my thoughts. I wanted to see this thing started but I didnt want to take the responsibility. I had wrote about it but was I actually going to put in the effort to make my words become a reality?

Yes I decided! I passed the idea around among other leaders and talked to the middle school pastor about it and they all agreed it was a great idea. I even mentioned it to a couple of kids I knew would be valuable to the team.

This was a big MISTAKE. Here was I getting everyone hyped up about it but not taking into consideration the time, effort, and energy I would need to put into it. When people would ask me about it I would tell them that things were still getting sorted out..which was half true..the part I forgot to mention was that right now I didnt really have time to sort things out.

Another month went by and the nagging gut feeling I had in my stomach did not go away..I knew that God had called me to this and I was selfishly denying it. I could not keep letting my own insecurities and worries get in the way of doing what I knew I needed to. Deep down I hoped that someone else could lead the team and I could just follow. I worried that the other leaders would not follow me because of my lack of ability to play guitar. I worried that there wouldnt be enough people to play on the team. I worried that I would fail.

But you know what! I would rather try than know that I had given up on God, given up on the vision, given up on the kids, given up on my pastor, and given up on myself. One of my favourite bible stories is in Matthew 14:28-32

8"Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water."
29"Come," he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!"
31Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?"
32And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. 33Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, "Truly you are the Son of God."

Peter took a great step of faith..if he hadnt stepped out of the boat he would have never been able to walk on water; as soon as he started doubting though, he began to sink. This is one of those steppin out of the boat moments for me- If I can have faith to lead this team, something that I have no ability to do on my own and dedicate myself to putting my full effort into it, I know God will work wonders.

I have set about to do it the right way this time. Over the past 2 months I have volunteered to learn sound on wed evenings..I have talked to many other worship leaders about how I should go about starting a team..and once I gained the knowledge to do this..I contacted those who had expressed interest in the team and gave a set date for when we would start practice.

The first practice was last night. I was discouraged at first but God gave me assurance. It went great =) and I am confident that things will continue to go well.
We have set practice times over the next month and are scheduled to start playing on the 19th.
Things are gonna be difficult- but "I can do all things through him who gives me strength."(Philippians 4:13)

Do something about things God calls you to and the visions he gives you! He wouldnt have given them to you unless he wanted you to turn them into reality! Dont let your insecurities and worries interfere..for who or what is greater than the one you follow..NO ONE and NOTHING! Take a Step UP.

Tessaling :D